just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize