Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
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