SEEEEXXX PLEASE
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Randomize