her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize