You know the @ sign on twitter? i wish there was one of those in real life so that the smokin' hot guy at the bar would know the slutty unbuttoning of my shirt was directed @ him, not @ his friend who looks like Mickey Rourke post-face melting
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
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