oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
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