Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
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