I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
How does it feel to date your dad?
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize