Me. At least after what I've been through.
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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