after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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