Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize