My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
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He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
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I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Randomize