Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
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