did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
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