Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
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