Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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