Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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