If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
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You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
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You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
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