Jerry, you need to find god
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Randomize