Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize