i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
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