Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you will always have a special place in my vag
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
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