im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
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