I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Randomize