Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
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