Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Green mimosas i think yes
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
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