well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
It all started with a game of naked twister.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Randomize