Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
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