EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize