how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
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