well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Two ladies just showed up with my fucking purse. It was in the fucking street. I'm a train wreck. As a financial advisor, this shouldn't happen. I should be an adult.
I have bruises all over my body. Seriously, I'm a train wreck. I'm too damn old for hangovers like this.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
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