So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
i think i just naturally attract stoners
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize