Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
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I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
This baby is an asshole
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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