Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
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