Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Randomize