I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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