Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
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