I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
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