She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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