Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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