how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
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On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
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I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
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