id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize