Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
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