it wasn't lemon gatorade
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
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