At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
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