Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Randomize