Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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