I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
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