is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize