best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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